Life seems full of distractions and obstacles whenever we want to do something amazing, something that really demonstrates who we are. We all have dreams but not all of us can fulfil that dream due to lack of knowledge about how to overcome these obstacles and distractions.
There are several things that I want to do before I leave this world ( I am not ill by the way, but all of us die eventually ) and somehow stuff gets in the way all the time. Even when I feel so determined, I just cannot get things done as I wished. I used to believe that the things on my way to accomplish the things I want are in my surrounding, wether it is house work, study, child etc. It seemed that I just do not have the time do to what I want to do, but then how am I spending my time? It leads to the answer that I wasn’t doing what I wanted to all this time. This is only partially true though, since I enjoy being a parent, I enjoy being a student and I also like cooking. But the problem wasn’t those things, the problem was myself, I was on my way to accomplish the things on my list.
I have contemplated a lot and what I discovered was surprising. I had a lot of self doubt. In the beginning it was almost impossible for me to admit it, since my pride didn’t allow that. Although it felt like self assaulting, the only way of accomplishing true confidence is to accept my short-comes and be kind to myself on the process of improving myself. The more we deny our mistakes , the more we suffer, and we will end up being an arrogant and narcissistic person.
Once I accepted that I have self doubt, I suddenly become very kind and patient towards myself. When I try something new, I tell myself ” it is ok if you get it wrong, you are only human, and it is human to make mistakes. I will not abandon you even if you do it wrong and fail. We can always try again next time. “.
Showing kindness and patience to myself changed everything. I actually got my confidence from accepting my weakness. I no longer am afraid of presenting myself to others as a person who can make mistakes, who can be weak and sometimes who can do stupid things, yet these mistakes and failure cannot stop me from trying again.
When you want to do or accomplish something, the secret is to just do it. I read this line from a book ” if you only begin it, it can be completed. ” So, just do it by starting it, whatever its that you want to do. Most of the time, concerning to much about the consequences is what keeps us away from trying. We human being are so used to think about what might go wrong. Honestly, no one knows that, even if you stay in a cave alone and meditate for thousands years, you cannot see the future. So give up on having control of the outcome, and just begin the project ( or whatever you want to do), and only focus on what you do.
This maybe against what you have known so far. Let me tell you something else, we came to this world to learn and evolve. We didn’t born with all the knowledge we need to lead a happy and successful life. As child, we interpret out surroundings and the event that happened to us in very immature way and most of us didn’t get help to form the correct belief about ourself and the world we live in. So when something new come to you, be flexible to test it out and if it serves you adapt it as your truth. This is how we evolve and heal ourselves.
Lots of love